Tuesday, September 30, 2008

and the winner is...

wingnut...congratulations!...you did your google work well, sir!...when i posted the "contest" i listed as the "prize" a phone call with me...if that is something you are interested in, let me know!

everyone - a round of applause to the winner of our first contest!

oh!...and i think comfy has a contest on her blog as well, so make sure you check it out!!

cg

Monday, September 29, 2008

i do

ten things to think about before considering marriage (conventional or otherwise)....

1. you will have to share a bathroom - men, if you leave your razor in there - she will use it (not to mention all the hair that women leave behind in a shower (okay, so i have long hair and my hair gets everywhere)

2. you will have to share a bathroom - women, if you buy cute towels they wont be cute for long - it wont be long before you see pieces of them cut into "scraps" in the garage....dont say i didnt warn you!

3. you will have to share a bed - sexual activity aside, there are issues of temperature, covers, pillows, sleeping space, snoring (hey, women snore, too!)

4. you will have to share a garage - for something that is supposed to house vehicles, men have some pretty well-defined ideas of how they want "their" garage to look...and it stands to reason for the most part because women typically dictate the decor/etc of the house in general while the men guard their "man-caves" like ebenezer with his gold...

5. you will have to share the television - as a football fan, do you know how many men i have encountered that do NOT like to watch games??...in my family, i am the only person...PERSON...that likes football...wtf??...

6. you will be accountable to another person (to a certain degree)...no more running out at midnight to the store or with friends...most spouses would be very suspicious of that behavior...

7. you will part of a new group of couples-only - as much as you will try to keep separate friends and such, it wont work...why not?...because your friends will want to "double-date" (which is a stupid word - four people still make it ONE date) then the women become friends (or not!) which adds another dilemma...

8. you will have to be around your SO's friends - which sucks if you dont like them...

(i dont have 9 and 10 because i am a lame loser who cant think atm)

anyhow, go out and get married, live in sin, join an orgy - makes no never mind to me - i get to sleep in my own bed, piss in my own toilet when i want (i dont have to wait for anyone), and i watch the tv when i want...unless my sister wants to watch something, in that case we try to be the first one to turn it on and hoard the remote....

cg

Saturday, September 27, 2008

guess what

question: what leaves me feeling fully satisfied at the end, yet leaves my fingers aching and feeling stiff?? (hint - it was what i did last night and this afternoon - think outside of the box, people!)

offer your answers up to the curious girl...hmm...i suppose i should have a reward or something...it probably wont be nearly as exciting as some of you would like, though!...

maybe a phone call with cg herself! (no, not THAT kind of phone call lol)...we shall see...

cg

EDIT: i will offer up one clue per day...to make things more accessible for everyone - does that help, sugarbaby??


CLUE #1: what do lead, steel, and tortoises have in common (i am trying REALLY hard not to give it away guys - but this might give it away anyhow)

CLUE #2: it can have four, six, seven, eight, ten, or twelve with six being the most common
(no one has guessed correctly as yet)

CLUE #3: robert johnson

okay, if you dont have it by now...for shame!

"rear" view reflection

what is it about the fascination of all things anal that drive people to stretch and explore this tiny part of the human anatomy...it leads me to say just one thing...

ewww....

i am all for others exploring and pushing their orifices open wide for sexual pleasure...but it only brings one thing to mind....the scene from the film "evolution" with david duchovny and orlando jones when the doctors are attempting to retrieve an alien insect from the tush of orlando jones...

oddly enough, i am very much interested in others' experiences...it offers a different perspective...

the idea of anal pleasure for the public at large has been promoted through various films...it has become more common for men to massage anally whilst masturbating...

while writing this post, my ass cheeks reflex and quiver...but NOT in anticipation...quite the opposite...

but for so many, the idea of going on an ass-tastic voyage is just the little vacay they enjoy...

which one are you?

cg

Friday, September 26, 2008

complications

i love creating a post out of someone else's comment because the trail of thought that begins where another's ends is a delicious maze of loopy madness that never makes sense because it makes perfect sense...in this case, mnwhr said
"Life without complication is like eating cake, Great but I think it would get old after a while"


so very true...but predictive relations can be comfortable and warm like sheets fresh from the dryer...warm, soft, and clean-smelling...they are predictable and wonderful in their predictability...the warmth and the softness and the clean scent never get old...they are always, interestingly enough, refreshing and bring a smile to your face...

life with monotony would get old...life without complications would be like drifting in a boat with no oar where the weather was always perfect and the water was always clear and things just always seemed to work out...

but complications are the sweet in our salty and the salty in our sweet...a joy to some a disaster to others...it isnt the flavors that set us faulty...it is the perception of those tastes...

so, if it is in the perception, i say let them eat cake and then follow the cake with a nice cold beer...that should balance out those tastes...

cg

Thursday, September 25, 2008

the awakening

the sun shimmers as it sets...the time between times...twilight has come...the magic time in ancient folklore...a sumptuous feast shall be set soon...the long slumber is ending...look out, look out wherever you are...i will find you...

my teeth will sink into your flesh in my dizzy race for sensorial exploration...your ears will ring with my call...your eyes will burn at my sight...

wait...that sounds too much like medusa coming out of the cave...or is that clay aiken coming out of the huge walk-in closet with spinning racks, custom lighting, and floor to ceiling shoe racks...

cg

(if i even have any more readers left...lol)