Wednesday, December 24, 2008

i effin hate holidays

i tried this year to get into the whole christmas spirit...jingle bells, santa smells and all that jazz...but the fact is this: i want to be alone on christmas...i have always felt that way...no, i am not depressed...i just dont like all the hoopla it comes with...

people are cranky, stupid presents that dont mean anything, people that think they know you and dont...

i just wanted to be alone...but can i have that one little thing?...of course not, people put that pressure "oh, it'll be fun" or "but we havent seen you in a while, i was hoping we could catch up"...why the fuck for?...if you really wanted to "catch up" you wouldnt have dropped from existence, thus necessitating a need for "catching up"...you would already have been there all along or at least drifting in and out periodically...

then...with no time (literally) to do anything for myself, let alone do the stupid christmas shopping, i sent my sister to do the deed...and she did well...but...it's christmas eve...and she forgot to get things to put the gifts in...what, should i be like fucking santa and carry it all in a big red sack and say "oh, hi, i am being eco-friendly, so no wrapping paper/bags this year!"...yeah, they would so not get that...

then...all i wanted to do was blow dry my fucking hair...and i said...i am going to blow dry my hair...she saw me doing it...so what does she do...she goes and turns hers on...after the fourth time of the dryer stopping, i throw it on the floor and go to her room "tell me when you're done so i can do my hair" ...so i was snappy...i am pissy dammit...

dont ask me what's wrong...it doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure it out...you didnt do the things i asked you to do, i have a headache, i am hungry, i want to blow dry my hair but cant...and if you are a woman, you know this...once your hair dries naturally, what the fuck point is there to fucking blow drying your hair??...so now, with less than two hours before we have to leave, i have to re-wash my hair...why re-wash...because i had already put other hair products into my hair and when it gets re-wet it never works...i've tried...

i want to scream and cry and say "fuck off" to christmas...

sonofa...

cranky bitch (formerly known as cg)

4 curious people say...:

Merlin said...

I love the idea of showing kindness and consideration by giving thoughtful gifts to people you love.

It's the forced deadline aspect of the holiday that I find annoying, as well as the regimented group-think of hackneyed symbols and banal music repeated ad inifinitum.

Why can't we focus on being good to each other 365 days a year, instead of just one?

curiousgirl said...

yuppers...why cant christmas be a truly peaceful time...and why cant the spirit extend to the other days of the year...it's like we struggle to be joyous during that one month of the year...what does that tell us...

cg

mnwhr said...

I love the crowds and chaos as long as I can go in and out of it without having to "play" along by shopping and all the other crap. Hope you found your nice piece of alone time to enjoy.

curiousgirl said...

@mnwhr - eh, it ended up being fine...i think i dread being bored in a sea of people...but we all had fun and that was good!

cg